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When I reflect back on the last 365 days, I see a lot of ups and downs. I see victories and I see failures. Most importantly, I see growth. I have learned so much and I have gained so much, this past year. I have never really looked back on an entire year, like this, before. But, today I am diving right in. This is my 2018 year in review.
This year has definitely seen me through a roller coaster of emotions. 2018 started with an infertility diagnosis. I was bitter and depressed about what my body could not do. I started distancing myself from God, because I felt like it was unfair. Why me? I sought out a fertility treatment center and I tried doing an IUI. When that failed, I gave up. I gave it all back to God. I should have never taken it from Him, in the first place.
Even though I could have tried a few more IUI’s, I decided it was time to stop fertility treatments. They were horrible for my mental health. For you strong mamas out there, that have conquered fertility treatments like a boss…You are amazing. That’s all I have to say about that.
But after a lot of prayer, I knew that wasn’t my intended path. Honestly, I always knew it wasn’t my intended path. I just tried to fight against it. You can only fight against your purpose for so long, though.
Which leads me to one of the greatest blessings of 2018:
I’ve talked about why we chose the adoption route, before, so I won’t go into the details. I’ve just always known I was meant to adopt. Justin and I had plans to adopt and we had discussed it, before we were married.
It was my own head, that got in my way. I thought it would be better to have a biological child first, so that maybe we would be more prepared to adopt a child.
I imagine God laughing about that one.
It was time to stop trying to fix it all for myself and time to start following the plan, that I knew God had placed on my heart, a long time ago.
So, after taking a month to catch our breath and pray about it, we began the adoption process, in May of 2018.
It’s hard to describe the feeling of peace you have, when you surrender to His plan. I’m not saying that the entire process has been a cake walk. It’s actually the opposite.
It has been exhausting, time consuming, emotionally draining, and expensive.
But, it just feels right.
So, we trudge on through the paper work and the long periods of waiting and we keep praying for peace and a good outcome.
Traveling is a large part of our lives, because we enjoy it so much. We like to plan one big trip, every year, if we can swing it. Our 2019 trip, will definitely be to Taiwan (to bring back our kiddo), so I guess our 2018 trip was the last one, with just the two of us. At least, for awhile.
I’m glad we got to go back to Europe. I’m thankful we were able to cross some more places off of our bucket list. Justin had always wanted to see Normandy. I had always wanted to see Ireland. We will both, always have a soft spot for Paris.
The memories from this trip will live on, through our photos and stories we tell.
You know you love traveling, when you are homesick for countries, that aren’t even your home.
I saved the most important for last! This year, I feel like I have seen my faith grow so much. Justin and I have found a church family, that we both love. Even though, we have attended for around two years, we didn’t officially become members, until this year.
I believe that our infertility and adoption journey have also played a big role, in the growing of my faith. Finally, stepping out and moving forward with the adoption was scary and we would have never made it this far, without resting on God’s promises.
I want to be able to continually say, “Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders…”
I’m not stopping here. I hope 2019 continues to bring more growth, in my faith.
2018 Year in Review
I guess you could say, that a lot has happened, this year. I do think I am going out of 2018 feeling a lot more hopeful and happy, than I was when I went into it. That’s enough of an accomplishment, for me!
There will always be bumps in the road. It’s all about how you react to them. If you learn and grow, from the hard times, then the good times will be that much better.
What did your 2018 look like? Do you take time to reflect, at the end of the year?
Are you ready for 2019?! Cause, it’s coming, whether you are ready or not!
Until next time!